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Entry tags:
MAILBOX; inbox
House 1411
"Hello? Hello?? I'm sorry, there's nobody home right now. [ obnoxious peal of laughter: go ]
Ahh, that's right! Leave a message, and I'll get back to you. Right? That's how it goes? Aha, no telemarketers, please!
If you run up my bill, I'll have to ask you to pay the extra costs.
[ BEEP ]
CALL
[ RING RING RING ZURAPHONE TO SPACEBALL ]
Tatsuma?! Are you there?!! Pick up!!! IT HASN'T EVEN BEEN THIRTEEN MINUTES!!!
Re: CALL
Zura, Z-z-z-zurak-k-ki! Zuraki, it's here! She's here! Zuraki you have t-t-t-to d-do something for me!
no subject
...
[ he spends roughly three seconds shrieking internally before answering. he'll sound just as panicky and in a higher pitch than usual, as he presses the phone to his ear with shaky hands ]
I-it's Katsura -- nevermind, hang in there! I'm coming! W-what is it that you need?
no subject
no subject
You want me to bring it over?! It's dirty and I can't find my laundry gloves!
[ argh ]
...can't you cut off some of your hair? I'm sure it would clog anything, too!
no subject
[ he's trying not to laugh, leaning against the bathroom wall as he is. it's a feat of pure willpower, and he ought to be winning medals and awards left right and center with it alone. ]
Save yourself, Zuraki! The Jouishishi needs you! Kintoki needs your motherhenning! Think about Elizabeth!
no subject
[ he'll totally mistake that effort not to laugh for being strangled by a pond monster. he wails out some kind of a battle cry and dashes out the door. the rest of the conversation is completed while running. ]
I-- don't say such things! How can I help Japan if I don't even help a friend in need, huh? Elizabeth would never raise a proper signboard at me again!
no subject
[ a blood-curdling screech, and the call ends with an alarming clatter and the horrid gurgle and crack of his phone slamming into the half-filled tub.
when and if Katsura makes it into the bathroom of 1411, he'll come across a bloody, horrid mess, an image out of a man's worst nightmare. red is spattered across the floor, soaking a little into the cute little bathmats, staining the water in the tub a gut-churning arterial crimson and splashed all across the showercurtains. it may smell a little odd, more like tomatoes than blood, but that's just an illusion, promise, it totally isn't tomato juice. (it totally is.)
a geta floats abandoned and forlorn in the red water.
somewhere down the street, sakamoto tatsuma is on a nice evening stroll, out to buy take-out and maybe some nice flowers to give to katsura as a make-up gift later on. ]
1/2
[ he does make it into the unfortunate bathroom roughly five minutes later, kicking in the window with a hair-curling shriek of war, bomb in one hand and -- ]
[ --well, if anyone alive or whatever looks alive is in the bathroom at the moment, they're getting slapped in the face with a pair of stained tighty-whities, a few curly monkey hair still stuck between the fibres. ]
2/2
I... I was too late...
[ s o b s ]
Was it my fault? What kind of an idiot ignores a cursed text?! If only I hadn't sent it...
[ he fishes out the geta and stares at it ]
no subject
tomato juicefresh merchant blood. bursting with vitamin c!in a fit of ironic humour, sakamoto will likely drink to this moment, and order himself a refreshing bloody mary in celebration. ]
no subject
[ meanwhile Katsura will let everyone know of the life that departed today while cradling the geta close to his heart ]